I am the youngest generation that actually knows the impact of Ruth Bader Ginsburg. I am 71. I was in my 20s in the Seventies, we were at the end of the Vietnam War (which ended on my second son’s first birthday, April 30, 1975); Nixon resigned on August 9, 1974; women were just starting to gain recognition beyond “barefoot and pregnant.” The National Organization for Women was founded June 30, 1966; a group of women protested their limitations by burning their bras in 1968. Birth control pills weren’t available until 1962!!!
I met my husband when I was 19, in 1968. Married in 1969 when I was 20.
I was probably the last virgin on earth at 19 in 1968. I struggled with the whole issue of sex before marriage, how it would just kill my dad, how God would strike me dead, how I’d get pregnant and OhMyGod! Even after I got married, my male doctor was reluctant to give me birth control pills because I had “wide hips and ample room for babies.”
After seven years of marriage, I was a single mother in late 1976. I was ostracized by my married friends. Any new friends viewed me with trepidation if they had a boyfriend. When my sons were in school, parent-teacher conferences degraded down to teachers blaming ANY discipline problems on the single parent home atmosphere. I started taking my brother with me just so I had back up. My Bible Study group of ten couples and me, left me out of the God and Marriage study group, even though I was there. I finally told them that the wives were only jealous and afraid – afraid I might go after their God-loving husbands and jealous because I could leave my box of Tampax on the back of the toilet (my one jab at democracy for women everywhere).
My divorce was final in February of 1977. I had to have my parents co-sign my Penney’s charge card so I could continue payments on the tv I inherited with the boys. I was 28 years old. My “vehicle” was a red wagon that I put the boys in (3 & 4) to go to the store. My parents bought me an old used car that I ran for 20 years.
I had a Bachelor’s Degree in Social Work in 1971 but could not get a Master’s after my divorce because I couldn’t get financial aid because I already had the privilege of graduating from college (that I paid for by myself).
I had a string of secretarial jobs, finding the only way to get a raise was to quit and move on, the priority being, of course, finding the new job first and then quitting. I was always starting over on vacation time, sick leave, and health coverage. I can visualize my budget sheet on the kitchen counter. It was always there. I was always working on how to squeeze my check out to pay necessary bills. One night, February 13, the boys and I sat at the kitchen table filling out precious-paid-for Valentine’s cards for their classes by candlelight because my lights were turned off for a $16 balance.
I bought my home in 1987 when I was 38 and the boys were 14 and 15, while I was a secretary at a manufacturing firm. My wish was to be a legal secretary (more money). I finally made that transition in 1991, making $500 more a month. (I paid off my home in 2008, when I was 59.)
Men made more money than women everywhere I worked. They were also the top 80% of management. In the two law firms I worked at, women attorneys were rare. Female partners were extremely rare. It has only been in the last 25 years that I have seen female partners at either firm.
On a side note – the worst, WORST attorney I worked for was a woman, young enough to be my daughter if I had her when I was 35. The best attorney was a woman my age. The difference? One knew the struggle. One did not.
As a legal secretary I was always trying to improve myself. I did not wish to become an attorney, but I wanted to be a professional, to have a career, to matter.
At any rate, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, and strong women like her, blazed a trail for women today. Younger women seriously do not appreciate the hard details.
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Posted to my Facebook home page as well as the Facebook group, YOU are now RBG 09/22/20.
