I have gone from fairly detail-oriented and highly organized to totally discombobulated in just six months. Am I sick? Do I have Alzheimer's? Do I really want to know?
Last week I was almost out the door to go to the store when it occurred to me that I was slightly off kilter. Tipsy. Lopsided. I had a high heel on one foot and a flat sandal on the other. I had walked through the house that way, really not noticing, as I am a bit tipsy all the time. What if I ended up at the store that way?
You've done it too. You've gone to the fridge, opened it, and then stood there with glassy eyes wondering why in the heck you were in the fridge in the first place?
I've done that way too many times. Recently I was sorting through my costume jewelry, putting each piece in little plastic bags. A couple days later, I went back to my jewelry box to look for a particular bracelet. And I came upon a longer bag with three bracelets placed in it side by side. Hey, that wasn't ME that was so organized. Who did that??? I couldn't remember one single second of organizing my bracelets that way only two days before.
The topper – I cashed my incentive check for $600. I wanted one very crisp hundred dollar bill for a friend's daughter's wedding gift. A week after the wedding I was getting ready for a trip to Seattle and was going to use the remaining $500 for the trip. It was No Where in my purse. No Where! And then it occurred to me that I must have had one of my brain freezes again and horror of horrors, I must have given the bride my entire $600. I didn't even give my own son that much when he got married! I even cried on the shoulders of my friends – how stupid could I get??
This weekend I had time to read a book I hadn't been able to touch for about a month. I opened it and out from page 99 came five one hundred dollar bills. And instantly I remembered I put it in the book so I wouldn't lose it. And promptly forgot that I had done it.
So again, sick? Alzheimer's? Dementia? Senility?
Some things you just don't want to know about. On the other hand, maybe if I find out, I'll forget that I found out and nothing will change. This could be the start of something new. I could buy one book and read it. And read it. And read it. And it would always be new. If you are losing your memory but can't remember if you are really losing your memory, who would know? Is ignorance really bliss?